Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Into the Labyrinth

Hello everyone. I'm not sure how to begin this thing. I know what this first blog is going to be about but I'm just not sure how to formulate these first few sentences in a way that opens things up easily. The very first part of a writing project are always my clumsiest so let's just jump right in.

I want to use this as a template to formulate and express my inner thoughts as regards God, politics and my relationship to both. I actually haven't ever done such a thing in a very intentional fashion before. People know that I'm a Christian and most people know that I'm very opinionated about politics and have a few controversial ideas. Hang around me long enough and you will be exposed to one of my random bursts of pontification; a few moments where I take a soap-box, make a spectacle of myself and retreat back into my shell. This is enough to tip people off that there is genuine activity beneath my typically calm exterior but not quite enough to indicate what the full-scale philosophy is that gives shape to my thoughts. In fact, some people may be surprised to find that there actually is a specific, definitive philosophy guiding the things I say.

Granted, I cannot truthfully claim that I am certain I have no contradictory beliefs, that it all can be summed up in some flawless system entitled "Brianism." What I mean is that you will really never hear me pull some idea straight out of my ass. Most of the views I espouse I am able to trace back to the thoughts of someone other than myself such as a writer, minister or philosopher. Anything else I say is the end result of an at least moderately rigorous line of independent reasoning. This may leave me behaving, on occasion, in a way that others view negatively. Because I have, in a sense, worked hard to arrive at the most truthful conclusions as I see them, I have little patience with people who seem to dismiss my views offhandedly without sound reasoning. People often employ cliche' when they don't have the ability to give their point of view much backbone. My girlfriend can attest to how much I detest this.

For instance, if I'm speaking out against the war in Iraq someone may respond with the old canard "You should be quiet because they're fighting for your very freedom to crticize what they're doing!" Such phrases make me want to explode. Intellegent people wouldn't say things like that because they would realize how awfully circular an argument it is.

Of course, humility is something I strive for and I know that I should probably try to handle such situations with love. What can I say? I'm working on it.

And that is a great segue to introduce the topic of my Christianity. I'm saddened when it seems people know more about my crazy politics than they do of my faith. My faith is in actuality a much larger part of who I am than my politics. In fact, my politics are not only intricately interwoven with my Christianity but I also desire to subordinate my politics to my Christianity. In other words, I live in a constant fear of allowing my priorities to become skewed. The worst thing that could possibly happen is that my political views become a stumbling block in another person's walk with the Lord.

Now, I won't be going in depth as regards my politics or my Christianity in this first entry but I will show you what I mean when I say that my politics are intricately interwoven with my Christianity.

The first serious political point of view I ever independently developed was a direct result of my faith, though it wasn't a "religious" political topic in the popular sense. In fact, it had to do with a topic that people don't talk about enough; the danger of blind nationalism.

When I was 12, I had what I consider my conversion experience. I didn't go looking for it and it fell on me, almost forcefully, like a ton of bricks. I didn't fully recognize what it was at the time but it was and is obvious that immeadiately afterwards something signifcant shifted in my spirit. I intend to go into detail about that in a later entry.

Naturally, as my teenage years progressed my mind became sharper and more questioning which was certainly a part of what lead me to my first political opinion but the signifigance of the topic may not have hit me so hard at the time if it weren't for the voice of the spirit I had carried with me since my experience as a 12 year old.

I don't remember precisely when it first occurred but at some point I began to ask myself why I should cover my heart during a performance of The Star-Spangled Banner or the daily recital of the Pledge of Allegiance. I wondered if people did the same thing in other countries and, moreover, I wondered why I should pledge my allegiance to anything other than God. I wasn't yet transposing the term "idolatry" onto the action but did, in a very substantive way, sense that something wasn't right about it. I began to feel that the pledging of allegiance to a flag or a country was somehow an affront to God, that it would undermine or cheapen my faith.

The thing is, I just didn't see what was so great about America and I certainly didn't understand why anyone believed America held a special role in God's heart. This wasn't based on any strong conviction about America's actions, for I was horribly ignorant about such things back then, I just felt that America was a country like any other and it was just silly to run around pretending to be so exceptional. I have since come to see that the founding of this nation was based on some very noble principles but I still hold firm to my conviction that we, as a people, are the same in God's eyes as the people of Spain, Russia, Iran, Zimbabwe etc. etc.

God does not value one nation over another and to pretend otherwise is to shrink him from the creator of the whole fucking universe to some pea-sized member of some ill-conceived assembly of stuffy legislators.

Now, please forgive me for quoting a song here. When I was that age I was highly influenced by the music I listened to so it played a crucial part of my development. I thought I was odd for the thoughts I was having because I wasn't yet aware of the history of great thinkers speaking out against the evils of nationalism until I came across a song when I was 16 that legitimated precisely what I was thinking by practically singing my thoughts back to me.

Plenty will laugh at this selection...well, let them laugh.

From "Anthem" by Five Iron Frenzy

I can't see red, white and blue waving in the air
I don't hear the bombs bursting and I don't even care
Sorry for my lack of faith
I'm not the greatest patriot
If this is all there is to freedom I don't want it

I can't fall anymore for some silver-tongued song
Your freedom isn't free
So let me say what freedom means to me

The song later went on to claim that Jesus was the only true source of freedom in life and that helped me to see that maybe I wasn't just an oddball after all. Perhaps others felt the same way; that exalting a nation the way we do in America is, in some way, displeasing to God. From that point on I decided to never put my hand on my heart again during the recitation of the Pledge or the national anthem. However, I should note that that's a personal conviction. It's the kind of thing that I won't do but I won't think any less of anyone who does.

All the political views I have since developed are all branches, twigs and leaves that have grown out of the trunk of that initial revelation. So, as I hope I have coherently shown, all my political views are rooted in one particular view that exists because of my Christianity. Therefore; there is inseperable interplay between the two subjects within me.

And so now begins the journey through the interwoven strands of both my Christianity and my politics in my incurably inquisitive mind.

6 comments:

  1. I look forward to this, Brian.
    Coral Rose
    nakiru.wordpress.com

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  2. I like your whole blog except two things, which are actually really only one thing... and that one thing you kind of touched on anyway.

    You said "to do blah blah blah is to make God pea-sized" (paraphrasing) and you also said "Intelligent people wouldn't say things like..."

    The truth is, intelligent people *do* say (moronic) things like that... and people do things that, to you, may make God seem small. I think the key is, to not dismiss them, their ideas, or worldview because you disagree with them -- regardless of how much evidence you have to prove them wrong. No one will ever listen when they feel like they're being backed against a wall or when they feel they are being patronized, etc.

    So, as you write your thoughts -- which I am eager to read as I think you are incredibly intelligent and thoughtful -- remember what you said about learning humility. I think that's one of the things of Jesus that we sometimes forget to mirror. I mean, I know I do sometimes. There is a chance, ya know, that you're wrong too, even if your logic seems perfect. People like Richard Dawkins are absolutely positive that they are 100% right meanwhile, they say things like, "Humanity does thing that society calls 'evil' because we're afflicted with a virus." RATHER than just admitting that there is something called "morality" because he knows that by admitting morality, he has to admit to a sense of right/wrong and that leads to a God and to hell.

    So, yes, humility. I.e., you can post your thoughts without belitting the thoughts of others. At least, thats what I think.

    And, in case I didn't make it clear: great blog. great idea. I'm a "follower" :-)

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  3. Well I actually read the whole thing...and I don't disagree with you. However, i think you should make a distinction between nationalism and patriotism. I looked both of these words up and while i have no issues with a patriot: "devoted love, support and defense of one's country; national loyalty", nationalism is much different: "excessive patriotism; chauvinism; the policy of doctrine of asserting the interests of one's own nation, viewed as separate from the interests of other nations or the common interests of all nations". So yes, God does not think America is any more special than any other nation, but i don't think there is anything wrong with being proud to be an American or proud to be German or Japanese or whatever you are. I think you risk offending people with this because they think you're saying it's bad to be patriotic, which maybe you are but i hope not.
    And in response to the other comment...i don't think it's necessary to never belittle others thoughts, some thoughts deserve some criticism, but that's just my opinion.

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  4. I thought your characterization of yourself near the beginning of the blog was so interesting: "Hang around me long enough..." That was so accurate as to what one might observe after hanging around you long enough.

    Also, if one should give you enough time and space, more than just your "bursts" will unfold. I like your idea for this blog because it GIVES you that time and space to expound and not be interrupted -which I have been guilty of doing to you many times, I'm afraid.

    I thought Bonnie's clarification between Patriotism and Nationalism was a very appropriate addition to the blog.

    I think the word "egocentrism" might also fit along with "nationalism" which is truly apart from being grateful for what freedoms we enjoy because of those who died defending them.

    I have also had the moment wherein I felt strange "pledging my allegiance" to anything other than God, or repeating stanzas of any kind with the masses after a leader invokes involvement. I'm like, "who's the crazy person getting a kick out of hearing all these drones mindlessly committing to something they don't understand?"

    ~Stephanie

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  5. Thanks for the feedback everyone. Criticism is hard for me when it comes to stuff like this because I feel like I'm laying a part of me out to be scrutinized when I post it which causes anxiety from the outset which makes it harder to take it all in stride. I'll address a few things briefly...don't have much time.

    Sarah -- Thanks for pointing that out about me saying "Intellegent people wouldn't say...." It's possible I could have worded it differently. It's a writing technique I sometimes use; saying something plainly, simply and unequivocally in order to grab the reader's full attention and give the point a lot of weight. I understand what you're saying and it's true that alot of people that are technically intellegent may often make that statement but I really detest those kinds of phrases because they hinder truth. And I didn't mean to suggest that someone can't disagree with me on the Iraq war and still be intellegent. All I meant to say is that that particular argument is ridiculous. While your point is probably totally valid, I just can't conceive how an intellegent person could end up saying that.

    And as concerns the tendency of people to reduce God to the respecter of a nation; I'm offended when I see people do that. I didn't intentionally draw any connection between that comment and my statement of "Intellegent people wouldn't say..." All kinds of people make ridiculous claims that shrink the size of God and I only meant to express that I think it's a travesty.

    Bonnie -- There is a disctintion between what I am speaking of and patriotism. I suppose I could have been clearer. However, I won't deny that things some may consider a simple expression of patriotism are, in my mind, an expression of dangerous nationalism. An individual may participate in very simple, harmless expressions of national pride such as waving a flag, singing the national anthem etc. These things are usually not coupled with a pronounced, nationalistic arrogance but with a kind of uncritical general sense that the government has a benign and well-intentioned nature. When you multiply this mindset by the millions you get something very dangerous; a nation of sheep who, if I'm right, has blood on its hands.

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